Neil always knew he wanted to be a Father. Within the first few weeks of dating, he had told me that if I didn't want kids we shouldn't be together because he was going to be a Dad... and a good one.
One of the first questions people will ask you about being pregnant is "how are you feeling?" To which I always want to respond "in regards to what?". I HAVE SO MANY FEELINGS YOU HAVE TO NARROW IT DOWN! - seriously.
The day before Mother's Day we spent the day celebrating in style with friends and family the beautiful life that is Zoe! Grandparents came from 4 different towns across SK and MB, Auntie came from Vancouver, Great Grandma who shares a birthday and turned 92 on Mother's Day even came to celebrate with us. It was a fabulous day I won't soon forget.
When someone tells you they are now carrying a human baby the size of a lego man that will grow into a watermelon within 9 short months, please do not respond with "oh, wow! ... I bet that was a surprise!". Why? because even if it was, we have enough emotions to deal with without adding in how to analyze your response
Did you know I was watching? I've watched you since I was a little girl playing dress up in the basement.
It makes me dig deeper, it get's me closer to His words and it makes me re-read it more than I would otherwise. I now look FORWARD to getting in the word instead of (before) just having another thing to do.
That's normally all people tell you. How excited they are, how their partner finally felt it kick, what the nursery is going to look like, the cute clothes they've bought for their little one. But sometimes there is a whole lot more to be talked about.
I felt as if He grabbed my hands and held on tight. Now, I didn't actually feel hands in my hands, but somehow I knew, it was if God was holding them. I curled my fingers down and rested in that moment. That might not make sense to everyone, but I don't know how to explain it any other way. And God spoke to me in that moment.
Although Zoe is only 10 months old, she already mimics what I do, she knows when I'm paying attention and she can tell when I'm not. So the question is simple. What kind of Mama do I want to be and is that the Mama I am right now?
I had said out loud to friends "I will not have a C-section" 50x. Why? Because when you have PCOS you are more likely to have a c-section. Because I believe in the power of words. Because I wanted to stay positive. Because I was in denial that it could happen to me. Because I was afraid.